Swipe left, no I meant to swipe right, come back …… aaargh forget it!


For the sole purpose of writing a post, I decided to install Tinder.

I detest dating apps and any kind of online dating (they were the 3rd wheel in my marriage) but for the single Mum with very little child free time I can see how they would be appealing.  I have a feeling Tinder isn’t my thing.  I’m a little more traditional than Tinder. It always seemed like just an easy tool to use in today’s “hook up” society and quiet honestly that’s not me.  But I’m ready for a new love and I’m not going to find it at home sitting in front of the telly in my trackie pants drinking wine (or will I, thanks to the weird and wonderful world of online dating!!!!). So Tinder, here we go……

Oh. My. Goodness.

I’m actually struggling to put into words what I came across (including people I know – weird experience).

After I set everything up, I wrote a profile about myself (which was actually much harder than you think) I was then let loose onto the world of single (ok, let’s face it here, the majority are probably not single!!!!) men.

Here I am, come and get me.

And come and get me they did.  I found out quickly that in order to be matched with someone you had to both swipe in the same direction.  I kept swiping in the wrong direction, then I found out you have to pay money to get back someone you meant to swipe right on.

But after a couple of minutes I had matches.

The first “match” promptly sent a message.  A whale gif. Yep, you read that right – A WHALE GIF!  I didn’t reply, nothing I said was ever going to match a whale gif.

Next guy, a request for my address.  Next.

A message stating that I look like a snob. Awesome, you’re gong for the ‘treat em mean keep em keen’ approach.  Move along, not my thing.

Someone who admitted they were in a relationship.  I had to refrain from giving a massive lecture.  So I did what every mature adult would do.  Arranged to meet him and then not show up (I knew I would be deleting my profile before we were due to meet).

Not everyone was a nightmare, I did meet some nice guys who I’ve been chatting to on and off, but they’re mostly friend zoned now, there’s nothing …. sparkly.  Nothing that would make me want to put on proper make up and clothes and actually leave the house and my kids.

I need something sparkly, I am not going to find it here.

Tinder, swiftly uninstalled!

The search continues…..




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