5 Things About Life I Wish I Could Tell My Younger Self

“Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out.”

Do you ever wonder: why is life so difficult? Why can’t it be just smooth and easy? Why does it always have to be messy? But then again.. is it really chaotic? or… is it just you?

I’ve asked myself the same question more times than I can count with my fingers and I always get a different answer each time or sometimes even none at all.

It made me think. Maybe, I wasn’t meant to know the meaning of all these things that are happening to me or I just sucked at the art of living life.

There was something that I clearly did not understand, I did not get. Life was sending me a message, it was redirecting me to a different path but I kept resisting it because it’s not what I wanted. Each time I fought it, I failed and for every failure it took a piece of me until I was left with nothing.

I was so tired that I thought about ending my misery. There was clearly no fight left within me that I just stopped trying to do things my way. I gave up and just let the waves of life take me wherever it wanted.

It turned out to be the best decision I’ve ever made and here’s what I learned:

You Want To Be Miserable? Control Things That You Can’t.

There are things in life or in our current situation that we want to control or change. When things don’t go our way, we pout and we feel like the whole universe is conspiring against us. Well, it’s not.

The things that we have now in our lives whether we like it or not aren’t just placed there because the universe wants us to be miserable, it’s there temporarily for us to appreciate or teach us a lesson.

We make ourselves miserable if we try to control it or change it. The wisest thing to do is to accept it and embrace it willingly because soon enough, it will pass.

Playing The Victim Card Doesn’t Help Anyone, Not Even Ourselves

Before we became the strong person we are today, we were once weak. We can’t blame ourselves that at some point in our lives it seemed like life was bullying us and we just sat there all whiny and broken. Everyone of us may have been victims of circumstances, but that doesn’t mean we get to keep playing that card until we die.

Playing the victim isn’t only pitiful, it’s pathetic. We all know that’s not a good look on anyone. Everyone of us has experienced failures, loss or heartbreak and that’s how life knocks you out.

When you get knocked out, don’t just lay there and wait for someone to take pity on you. Stand up, dust yourself off and try again until you’re strong enough that anyone who tries to take you down will fall apart.

When Things Aren’t Clear, Don’t Be Afraid To Take A Step Back

Don’t you just hate it when things don’t make sense and the answers just don’t come to you? So you keep poking and prodding the problem hoping it’ll bleed out some kind of solution that will satisfy you, but you end up becoming even more clueless than we first started.

The truth is, the more we keep pushing ourselves to look closely, the more we won’t be able to find what we are looking for. We think that if we stop looking, we may never ever find it. But in reality, if we just become brave enough to take a step back to see the bigger picture that was forming in front of us, we’ll not only find the answers.. we will also achieve peace and clarity because what didn’t make sense up close, will make sense when you look at it from afar.

Be Clear About What You Want In Life And Don’t Be Afraid To Ask

Have you ever wondered why there are things that you want in life, but it seems impossible for you to have? Yeah, we’ve all been there. These things aren’t meant to be just a tease for us, we were meant to have it but then again, it’s not given to us because we aren’t ready to have it or we don’t deserve it yet.

We are all works in progress, but as we grow – the things that we truly want and need should be clear to us. If there’s one thing in your life that you can’t stop thinking about and it brings you inexplicable joy whenever it crosses your mind, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Because if you’re clear about what you want and you are truly sure about it, life will not think twice about giving it to you.

Challenges Hone Us To Become Better People

There are times that I think life likes to play a cruel trick on me. Throwing problems my way all the time, I can’t even get a day off! I hated trials and tribulations, I hated challenges.. But the thing is, problems weren’t given to us because the universe just likes to yank our chains. These challenges were designed to make us better versions of ourselves. Smarter, wiser and stronger. Life doesn’t give us challenges we can’t take. This reminds me of a quote that said “we were given these mountains to show everyone that we can move it.

So what I am trying to say is, the bigger the problem the more you should be flattered. it means that God, life, the universe thinks you’re a badass and you can take it on even with your eyes closed.

If we aim to live a simple life where unnecessary complications don’t exist, we are asking for a boring life. Problems, complications, trials and tribulations make life difficult, but interesting and if we overcome them – it can turn into powerful stories that can help other people conquer it. 

So is life difficult? Frustrating? Messy? Yes, it can be but these are also the factors that make it interesting. Is life messy because of you? Yes, it can be and it also depends on our mindset. Challenges can be obstacles or it can be opportunities for growth, it all depends on how we choose to see it.

Wondering whether life is chaotic or pleasant is a normal thing to do, everyone asks that but the better question that we should be asking is – what if life decides to play it’s little game with you – will you let it defeat you? or will you be brave enough to take on the challenge and beat it?

LD Fleming is a starving young artist who is passionate about helping people solve their love problems on her free time. She likes to write relationship tips and advice on personal growth/self-improvement. Check out her website at www.ldfleming.com or you can also find her on facebook : www.facebook.com/writerldfleming


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  • These are all good suggestions. I know that I have been working on trying to change my perspective in life so that I don’t perceive things as so terrible. I sometimes get lost in those thoughts, which is no good.

  • I definitely I identify with trying to control things you can’t making you miserable, LOL. It never works, darn it! Great post!

    • It took me quite some time to understand that I am not that powerful, I can’t control everything. Just keep going and you’ll be able to slowly let go of things. A step at a time. 🙂

  • So true! All of it! It took me until my thirties to realize I can’t control anything and I really ought to stop trying! Also I would add, when you think you are a little overweight, wait a year, you’ll look back and wish you were that weight again! Enjoy it while you can!

  • Isn’t that the truth?! I think this all the time. Things we thought we knew but had no clue as our younger selves. Great post.

  • Those are great lessons in life. I have also realized that everything happens for a reason be it for or against us. I agree with everything that you mentioned. Another important thing that I have learned is that I shouldn’t stop learning things. I must not settle with mediocrity and instead, I should always strive for excellence.

    • Yes I definitely agree with you. We stop growing if we stop learning! 🙂 Every experience and interaction we share with people, good or bad, is a learning curve. Let’s make the most out of it ^_^

  • This is a great post. I like the fact that we aren’t given what we cannot handle. And of course the part about not being a victim is also very important. It solves nothing.

  • Well done! I would name this piece “Things I would tell my adult self, too!” haha! There is this quote that goes something like “you can’t control the wind, you can just adjust the sails”. I feel like that epitomizes adulthood and with your first suggestion. Also, in your last suggestion about challenges — there is a fine line between challenge and pain. Yes, push yourself strive to be better and get uncomfortable, but don’t KILL yourself (this pertains to my post partum body and me working out in the gym lol!)

  • This is such a powerful, insightful post. I wish I’d encountered something like this when I was younger. Though it applies very much to my life now as well. Thanks for sharing!

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